How was it received?

One of my favorite follow-up questions when a leader tells me about a difficult conversation that they've had is:

"How was it received?"

When having difficult conversations with people we care about, it can be challenging to just say what we want to say. We become completely focused on the content of the message.

The next level beyond that the content is understanding how it was received.

It is our job as leaders to be present to how we are being received. We have the opportunity to tailor our message and delivery so that the recipient can absorb our message, understand our position, integrate any feedback, continue an open dialogue, not feel attacked, and actually deepen the relationship.

When we first make a choice to have difficult conversations, we tend to focus all of our energy on getting our points out. As we become more experieced in having these conversations, it becomes important to understand how that message will be received and optimize for that.