Why is perspective such a big deal?

I’m about to blow your mind with some facts from the animal kingdom.

Humans are trichromatic: we have 3 different types of photoreceptors in our eyes. We believe that this corresponds to being able to see red, green and blue, and from those 3 we are able to see millions of different colors.

Enter the mantis shrimp.

The mantis shrimp has SIXTEEN different types of photoreceptors, and we don’t even really know what that means. Sure, it can see colors that humans can’t. And. The mantis shrimp can also see ultraviolet light, polarized light, circularly polarized light, and I’m sure things we can’t quite comprehend yet.

We’re over here with our 3 photoreceptors thinking we’re so perceptive. Ha!

My favorite exercise on perspective involves 2 people facing each other. Put a paper in between them and ask them to read the number that they see on the paper. Person A responds “5” and Person B says “8.” Who is right? Well, both of them are correct. The side of the paper facing Person A has a 5 and the side facing Person B has an 8. If you ask them to defend their position, they could really take a stand for what they “see.”

This is the cause of a lot of arguments and pain. From one person’s perspective, they may see something totally different than another based on their vantage point, past experience, eye sight or any number of other differences.

It happens in politics, sales, science, leadership, economics, relationships. Everywhere really.

My brothers and sisters of nuance and discernment understand this. Perspective is everything. If we can do our best to truly put ourselves in someone else’s shoes, maybe we’ll see that it is actually and 8 and a 5. And maybe when we call something purple, we’ll realize how primitive that would sound to the mantis shrimp.

Are we allowed to change our minds?

I used to have very strongly held beliefs about certain things. Religion, politics, past lives, free will, nutrition, mental health to name a few.

As part of my heart opening journey and expanding my emotional range, I’m seeing many more things in shades of gray and not so black and white. There’s a whole world of nuance.

After spending a few years in SF, I had very strong judgements towards people who would talk about their past lives. I have since to come to discover things that have changed my mind. A bit. I still don’t think it’s a thing, at least as some of these folks describe it, but I’m not absolutely certain anymore.

Because of our collective dwindling ability for public discourse and discernment, I’m not sure it’s safe for people to change their minds. If you have a certain political belief, it is frowned upon to agree with someone on the other side of the aisle. We have decided to be pro-polarization and anti-discernment.

We are so quick to cancel and completely cut people out of our lives. In doing so, we are reinforcing fixed identities. We don’t allow for people to grow and change because we are comfortable with who they are and how they think.

I’m guilty of this. As with most things I write about here, I’m speaking from my own personal experience and journey. I like for people to fit into nice, neat boxes in my mind of who they are and what they believe. If they change their mind, it messes up my tidy judgements. I’m working through it, and it’s a major shift for me. In doing so, I hope that I can become more comfortable with changing my own mind and allow others around me to feel safe to do the same.