What is my process to answer really difficult questions?

I had a fun call with a friend this morning who has a difficult career decision coming up. I asked him what his process was for figuring out the answer. I had not thought about my own answer to this question until he asked me what I would do.

The initial response that jumped out to me and that I shared with him is one of the most powerful and under utilized tools that we have access to when creating something new.

"Who has already had to answer this question, and what can I learn from them?"

With very, very rare exception, there is almost always someone on this planet who has gone through what you are going through right now.

Whether it's starting a new company, figuring out a career move, or even working through some personal stuff, someone else has been there, done that. We have the opportunity to learn from them.

Figure out a way to get access to these people and ask them a few questions to help you on your journey. What did you come up with when you had to answer this question? What was your process like in making the decision? What would you do differently / what have you learned since?

Simple stuff, but it can be critical in your future decision making.

There are two reasons why this tactic isn't utilized more often:

1. We buy into our own story that we're so unique that no one else has ever had to deal with something like this

2. We are worried about what will happen as a result of asking

One is easy enough to overcome. Two is a bit trickier.

What if I talk to a competitor and they steal my idea, you might say. I'm sure I'll write more in the future about protecting your idea, but for now, let's just say it is incredibly rare for someone to steal another person's idea. If they've been around long enough, they've already thought through your idea at some point. And even if they're a competitor, in my experience they are still more likely to help than not.

I've discovered a few other ways to help me answer difficult questions I'll again save for another time, and yet this will always the starting point for me.

If you are fortunate enough (or crafty enough) to have access to someone who has been through a similar situation or dilemma, one of the most useful things we can do is to learn from their experience. Learn from the past to accelerate the future.